Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops, M.A., M.F.T.

I know from lots of personal experience the loss of a loved one is devastating.  I know it can dump a person into a very severe depression.  It can make us feel like we just can’t go on and that life isn’t worth living without that loved one.  I have literally helped thousands of people heal from the death of a loved one.  I know it’s important to understand that we all must leave this world when it is our time.  Death has no logic or fairness it just is and is the hardest part of living.  I also know that we heal when we find a way to live that honors ourselves and our loved ones still here and our loved ones that have passed away.

The worst thing we can do is feel guilty that we are still alive but a very special loved one has passed away.  No matter what we do, say or feel, nothing can bring that loved one back to us.  All we can do is live our lives fully, live our lives for ourselves and for all of our loved ones that have passed away.  The truth is that our loved ones don’t want to die and make us feel such unbearable pain because they are no longer here.  So it’s very important to fully appreciate the life of a loved one when they are alive and with us.  One of the tricks of a very successful life is to take nothing for granted especially those closest to us.

So when you lose a loved one grieve but don’t give up on your life.  Remember we are all only here for such a short time so live well and love well and I promise then you will have no regrets.  Don’t waste your life because we only get one time to do it all.  Tell people you love them, be affectionate and when they pass away carry them in your heart forever!

Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Nancy has a private practice in Diamond Bar. She runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and teen groups.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727 or email, nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s   books, “Live, Heal and Grow,” and “Midnight the Therapy Dog” at Amazon.com.