Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops, M.A.M.F.T.

I know from personal experience that the loss of a loved one is devastating.  I know it can dump a person into a very severe depression.  It can make us feel like we just can’t go on and that life isn’t worth living without that loved one.  I have literally helped thousands of people heal from the death of their loved ones.  I know it’s important to understand that we must all leave this world when it is our time.  Death has not logic or fairness; it just is and it’s the hardest part of living.  I also know that we heal when we find a way to live that honors ourselves and our loved ones still here and our loved ones that have passed away.

The worst thing we can do is feel guilty because we are still alive but a very special loved one has passed away.  No matter what we do, say or feel, nothing can bring that loved one back to us.  All we can do is live our lives fully, live our lives for ourselves and for all of our loved ones that have passed away.  The truth is that our loved ones didn’t want to die and make us feel such unbearable pain because they are no longer here.  It’s very important to fully appreciate the life of a loved one when they are alive and with us.  One of the tricks of a successful life is to take nothing for granted, especially those closest to us.

So when you lose a loved one, grieve but don’t give up your life.  Remember we are all only here for a short time, so live well and love well and I promise you’ll have no regrets.  Don’t waste your life because we only get one time to do it all.  Tell people you love them, be affectionate and when they pass away, carry them in your heart forever!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.