Danice Akiyoshi

“My girlfriend’s feelings have changed”

By Danice Akiyoshi, N.D.

Dear Dr. Danice,

Two months ago my girlfriend got a new job.  I have never seen her happier but she seems to spend less and less time with me.  She goes out after work with her coworkers at least three times a week.  I have not complained yet because she treats me well when we’re together, but I feel like her feelings for me have changed.  How should I bring up the subject?

Thank you,

Bryan

Hello Brian,

If I were in your shoes, I would simply ask her if she thinks your relationship needs any adjustments.  I would also work up the courage to ask her if her feelings about being exclusive with you have changed.  If she says no, give her a bit of space to enjoy her new situation for a reasonable amount of time.  If she says she’d like to make some adjustments or changes then ask her to be perfectly clear about the changes she has in mind.  If the changes she mentions are not acceptable to you then it’s time to wish her well and move on, because the part that comes next is rarely pleasant.

Good Luck,

Danice Akiyoshi ND

Danice Akiyoshi is a Naturopathic Doctor and the head of Candid Coaching Service. She offers personal coaching services relating to all types of issues and concerns. This is a letter she received from an anonymous reader. To send a question to Danice, email her at straighttalk@candidcoachingservices.com. You can also visit her website at http://www.candidcoachingservices.com.