Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

This holiday season Midnight and I with continue our volunteer work at the infusion center at St. Jude Hospital in Fullerton.  I think it’s very timely because to me the holidays are partly about giving back.  We take a lot for granted and working with cancer patients makes you really appreciate life.  So this year if you’re feeling grateful or maybe even sorry for yourself and not so grateful, do something wonderful for a good cause.  Do something wonderful for somebody else.

I think the holidays are about getting together with family and friends but also about giving something back.  You can make a huge difference in somebody’s life by being unselfish and volunteering, donating or whatever your thing is.  The holidays are a special time to show this world how very much you care.  Stop complaining about the state of our world and get out there and do an act of kindness.  I promise you, it will feel fabulous and you’ll stop feeling sorry for yourself and actually feel good this holiday season.

Take that money that you’re planning to spend on drugs or alcohol and give yourself a different kind of medicine.  Give yourself some medicine that is good for the soul.  The kind of medicine that comes from helping others and understanding that’s what we are suppose to be doing here.  What I speak of can be very healing and maybe you’ll begin to forgive yourself for all you’ve done wrong and start moving in the right direction.  Ending the year helping others can be a great way to motivate yourself to make 2016 a better & more productive year.  It’s never too late to become a better person and somebody that you can be proud of.  This year, give the gift of giving back!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (9090229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the therapy Dog at Amazon.com.  Please feel free to visit Nancy’s website at http://www.nancystoopsmft.com. for lots of tips and advice for living fully, healing and growing into who you are intended to be.

By Nancy Stoops  

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Did you know that suicide rates are among the highest during the holidays?  This may sound very strange to some of you, but it is true.  Believe it or not this isn’t a wonderful time of year for everybody.  I remember, as a little girl thinking how anybody could be sad this time of year.  Now that I’m grown up and work as a therapist, I understand this concept much better.

The holidays seem to make us vulnerable and open our eyes to things that are painful for us.  This time of year, we seem to become very sentimental and want to be close to our family and friends.  This is a great idea in theory, but what if you have alienated them or maybe they have passed away.  This could make your holiday feel like a very lonely time.  It makes it worse when you see other families and friends gather together.

Are you feeling without purpose this holiday season?   This may be the cause of your depression this time of year.  There are so very many places you could go and donate some time.  There are many people that are sick or just plain less fortunate than we are.  You could really make a difference for an individual, a family, or an animal and fight off the depression as well.

Whatever may be causing your depression during this holiday season, decide to do something about it. Don’t sit around and feel sorry for yourself this year, life is just too short.  Call an old friend, make up with a family member, help the less fortunate, or whatever else it takes to get through this holiday.  My point is, this year learn to help yourself, and you will give you, the greatest gift you have ever received!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at stoopsshecter@earthlinknet.  You may purchase Nancy’s latest books Live, Heal and Grow and Midnight the therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

Deciding to start therapy can be a very hard decision.  It’s hard to admit to ourselves that we can’t do it on our own and that we need some help.  The truth is even though we take care of ourselves sometimes we need the help of a good doctor or an antibiotic and sometimes surgery.  I have always referred to myself as an emotional surgeon.  What I mean by this, is that I open you up and help you begin to deal with all of those dysfunctional feelings that are making you feel so bad and so stuck.  Starting therapy takes an incredible amount of courage and is a sign of strength not weakness.  Please never feel embarrassed that you feel have run out of options and that now you need some help to get through some things.

Over the years I have worked with people 2-91 years of age dealing parenting, drugs, anxiety, depression, autistic spectrum disorders, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, appropriate sexual boundaries and so many other issues. Between my groups and my private practice I have literally helped thousands of people learn how to live a happy and balanced life.  I want my clients to be healthy mentally as well as physically and spiritually healthy.  I think all three of these go hand in hand to maintain permanent well-being.

A good place to start is by visiting one of my groups and seeing if you like my style before you start spending your hard earned money.  Keep in mind my co-therapist is a registered therapy dog named Midnight. If you are a dog lover you will have a great team on your side while you are doing some very necessary healing or just getting some tips on how to live more fully!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-072.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may ask Purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Do you seem to be always sleeping or not able to sleep at all?  Are you eating everything in sight or suffer from no appetite at all.  Have you lost pleasure in doing the things that once made you so happy?  Are you unable to focus and concentrate?  If you are able to answer yes to the questions above, you may be suffering from some form of depression.

Depression comes in many forms. Dysthymic Disorder is a very mild form of depression.  People suffering from this are very functional but just don’t feel happy.  People suffering from severe depression aren’t very functional and need to be treated.  Severe depression can lead to suicide and must be taken seriously.  Bipolar Disorder involves a cycle of a very manic mood and then a fall into a very severe depression.  Many times the mania is accompanied by severe spending or some other risk taking behavior.  People suffering from Bipolar Disorder need to be on medication.  There are subtypes within these main categories that I won’t be expanding upon.

Depression comes from a lack of serotonins, a chemical produced in the brain.  Many people chose to take a pill that will put the serotonins you are lacking back into your body.  Exercise is also a great way to increase your body’s serotonins and to do it in a natural way.  Many of my clients are asked to keep a daily feelings journal as a way to help combat their depression as well.

Don’t let your depression or the depression of a loved one become a way of life.  Everybody should be able to feel the joy and depression stops us from doing that.  Take the time to journal, exercise and possible get some professional help you need to feel the joy in your life.

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at stoopsshecter@earthlinknet.  You may purchase Nancy’s books, Live, Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

I have always been told that worrying is an insult to God.  I always had interpreted this as that we are in good hands and need to trust the plan for our life.  I believe being the best version of myself daily is really all I can do.  I have come to realize that all I really have control over is myself and how I react to my life.  I have no control over others or over their behavior.  I can be helpful as a therapist and plant seeds for change in people.  It’s not up to me whether those seeds get nurtured and grow into the very thing that provide tools for change.

The definition of anxiety is that our demands outweigh our means.  For example feeling as if there isn’t enough time to get everything done.  I think we can always work on improving our time management skills and sometimes we need to set more realistic expectations for ourselves and others.  We need to learn that Rome really wasn’t built in a day and we need to learn patience.  We need to pay attention to our bodies when we aren’t handling our anxiety very well.  We need to practice our deep breathing and our meditation.  We need to take time to pet and cuddle with our animals.  We need to work on staying in the moment and not thinking so ahead of ourselves. We need to just relax and have faith in ourselves, in others and in our life plan.

More than fifty percent of all illnesses are stress related.  If we can learn to relax and manage our stress than we won’t make ourselves sick.  Slow down, breath and have faith in yourself, in others and your life plan.  Learn to manage your life and your stress so that it won’t control you and your life!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.