Before the Morning

By Melody Kraemer

As I sit here in front of my laptop, with a cup of hot coffee to the right of me and next to that a notebook filled with the many things I need to accomplish.  The thought, “Oh Lord, help me make it through the day,” crosses my mind. The house is quiet, and I wonder how much longer before my boys (autistic boys) wake up.  How much time do I have to accomplish anything on that list next to me?

Once my boys are awake anything on that list is now pushed to another day.  I might be able to squeeze in a  few minutes to throw in some laundry, but I couldn’t tell you when it will come out of the dryer and get folded.

Having children, autism or not is a full-time job by its self.  Living in the autism world is a world where it’s no longer about oneself it’s about watching almost every moment of what they do.

My eight year old now has a thing about eating the top of pencils, almost every pencil in the house has no eraser.  Every paper clip, a piece of thread, Lego,

Basically any small object will find its way into my child’s mouth.

He is a curious one and will take apart things. He has no fear of heights and will climb and climb. He loves to explore the outside, but be always reminded, no bugs in the mouth, no snails in the mouth and no plants in the mouth.  Though those are just words and if I don’t constantly watch him he will have something in his mouth. There have been times where I’ve been grossed out.

We have high locks on the doors, and we have a front gate, we also have the backdoor strapped because when I take a chance on throwing that laundry in the washing machine I know, he can’t escape for that moment.

As I sit here and pick up that coffee cup on the right side of me, I hold it with two hands; I take in a deep breath and let it out, as I do every morning.  Will the day run smooth, or will I be finding something gross in the hands or mouth of my child?  Whatever the day may bring I will embrace it to the fullest, there is never a dull moment in this house.