Straight Talk with Danice

Danice Akiyoshi

Danice Akiyoshi

By Danice Akiyoshi, N.D.

A Letter from Meghan:

I have a friend who is constantly competing with me.  I hope you can help me understand her.  When I got a new car, within three months she got a new car.  When I changed my hair color and style, she attempted to duplicate my exact look.  When I got a dog, the next month she got a dog.  When I got engaged to my boyfriend of 3 years, within 6 months she was wearing an engagement ring from some guy she’s only been dating for a few months.  She doesn’t realize that all of our friends are laughing at her behind her back.  I feel embarrassed for her, but this is awkward for me.  I do not enjoy being the center of attention this way. We aren’t very close.  She is one of my sorority sisters and we have regular gatherings because many of us are getting married, having bridal showers and weddings.  I don’t want to pull out of the group. Aside from this problem we have a great time together. May I have your advice please?


Dear Meghan,

This woman obviously idolizes you.  If there is nothing about her behavior that harms you then let it go.  When your other friends attempt to make mention of your copy cat friend, discourage them.  This woman obviously has struggles about her personal identity.  She likes what she sees in you.  Perhaps you can view it as a compliment.  Even though it is awkward, I don’t see this as harmful for you.  If she starts to violate your personal space in any way then that’s a different story.  If that’s not happening, feel flattered; enjoy your days and your friends.  Take note that humans copy each other in many ways.  Look around.

Danice Akiyoshi is a Naturopathic Doctor and the head of Candid Coaching Service. She offers personal coaching services relating to all types of issues and concerns. This is a letter she received from an anonymous reader. To send a question to Danice, email her You can also visit her website at