Hands Down

By Pastor Rob Norris

Put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
Colossians 3:12

In a classic Sunday comic strip from Charles Schulz, creator of Peanuts, Linus is eating a sandwich and Lucy is nearby as he begins to ponder. “Hands are fascinating things,” he says. “I like my hands. I think I have nice hands. My hands seem to have a lot of character. These are hands which may someday accomplish great things. These are hands which may someday do marvelous works. They may build mighty bridges, or heal the sick, or hit home runs, or write soul-stirring novels. These are hands which may someday change the course of destiny!”

A moment of silence. Then Lucy’s one-line reply: “They’ve got jelly on them.”

Even as we laugh, we know that Lucy’s comment is typical of the way she treats other people.  unfortunately, it is also a picture of how you can treat your spouse. Rather than encouraging your spouse and building him or her up, you choose instead of be the voice of criticism and harsh reality.

Dr. John Gottman, a leading expert in sociological research, conducted a 10-year study to determine the types of communication — both verbal and nonverbal — The four critical elements he determined as being the most detrimental.

  • Criticism — nagging, deflating, picking at each other
  • Contempt — rolling your eyes, discounting the other’s value
  • Defensiveness — refusing to hear the truth or to deal with self
  • Stonewalling — retreating, withdrawing, not saying anything

Live it:

Take a look at how you are relating with one another and see how you can use attitudes and words to strengthen and encourage one another.

Invite the Lord to intervene every time you feel like saying something you shouldn’t..


Join us Easter Sunday for a Easter Celebration Service and Egg Hunt, Meeting @ 10:00 at River Heights Intermediate School 7227 Scholar Way, Eastvale CA.