By Nancy Stoops

What is it that seems to set you apart from somebody you consider a successful human being?  Do you find yourself always doubting your capabilities?  Are you really willing to always settle for less than you really deserve?  Don’t you understand that you have wings and that you really could fly if you just believed in who you are and how capable you really are?

Please trust me when I tell you that there are no limits except the ones that are self imposed.  You can be and have whatever you desire if you set goals and just keep moving toward them.  If you do this, after awhile you will be who you want to be and have the wonderful life that you are so very deserving of.  Right now this very moment make a promise to yourself that you refuse to settle anymore.  Today is the day that you will change that mindset that allows you to always be less and have less of a life than you desire.  Today is the day that you will discover your wings and each and everyday from now on you will discover how to fly.

I want you to become the author of your very own fabulous script for your life. Tomorrow is much too long to wait because all you really have is today.  Stop deceiving yourself and start being somebody you are proud of.  I know if you tell yourself the truth you will grow into somebody you really want to be.  I have witnessed the transformation of many and have had the honor of helping in the process as well.  Just know that I have faith in you and I know you can grow into who you are intended to be!!!!!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at 909 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

I believe each day that we have the honor of being alive is call for celebration.  Every morning as I awake and see the sun rising and filling the sky with majestic colors I am reminded of how lucky we are.  As I step out in the morning with Midnight my therapy dog I feel blessed for his friendship and for the health that we both have.  As we start our walk through our wonderful community I am proud to be part of it and I enjoy the morning song of the birds around us.  As we walk I enjoy the trees and flowers that represent life in the neighborhood.  Midnight and I are greeted by the other daily walkers with a friendly smile and warm hello.  It’s so nice to be part of such a wonderful neighborhood filled with such lovely people.  Sometimes the other dogs will visit with Midnight as we make our way through our neighborhood and that makes Midnight a very happy soul.

I think the feeling of the sun on my face is just magical.  The fragrant plants and flowers are intoxicating and so very delightful.  Swimming or floating in water has always been very freeing for me.  Laughter truly is the best medicine and I think we all could do a lot more of it.  Looking up at a night sky filled with stars and a full moon can be an experience that provides a wonderful kind of solace. Just hanging out with my grandson is fabulous.

These simple things I speak of don’t cost any money but are literally priceless.  I think if we all take time to appreciate the simple things that are so wonderful in our world we will be more positive.  I think then we will not dwell so much on what is wrong but focus on what is right!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at 909 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Life Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.net.

By Nancy Stoops

Can you believe summer is almost here?   Have you been putting off some very necessary therapy for your family or your child or maybe even yourself?  Well make this the summer of healing and don’t put it off anymore.  For the past twenty years I have been running a free counseling group that meets every Monday evening from 6-8 p.m. at the Walnut Teen Center.  Their address is 21003 La Puente Road in Walnut and their phone is (909)444-0089.  Even though we meet at the teen center I have help people of all ages with many different type of problems at this group.  We meet every week unless it is a legal holiday all year round.  I invite you and your family to come on down and try it out.

I also have the honor of running a free grieving group for the Walnut Senior Center located at 21215 La Puente Road in Walnut and their phone number is (909)598-6200.  This group can help with successful recovery from all types of loss.  I have had people attend that have lost loved ones, lost pets and even loss from retirement.  The funny thing is we actually do a lot of laughing and have a good time helping each other recover from what can seemingly feel impossible.  I have been running this group for seventeen years.  This group meets the first Friday of every month from 9-11 a.m. It is my privilege to have Midnight my registered therapy dog be my co-therapist at both of these groups.

I hope you will allow Midnight and I to help you and your family finally.  It will truly be our honor and pleasure to help you and your family members heal and finally grow into who you all deserve to be!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

We are going through some hard times right now.  There are many people losing their jobs, their homes and many budget cuts to very important programs are taking place.  I still believe things can be turned around.  I still believe that people are basically good.  I still believe anything is possible with hard work and tenacity.  I refuse to give up in believing that all great things are possible.  They say people or things have to hit rock bottom before getting better.  But, take a look around in all that is still right with our world.  Take a look around at all the good that still goes on in our world and our community.

Please don’t use the state of the world as a reason to stop believing.  They say all things happen for a reason.  I don’t know why people have to suffer.  I don’t know why bad things happen to good people.  I just know that I believe in the good this world still has to offer.  I also believe our efforts to be our best do get rewarded.  It may take some time to see the results of one’s hard work.  Please don’t become a victim of apathy or anger because you feel every road you take becomes a dead end.  Remind yourself that there are unlimited roads to travel down, and that eventually you will discover the right one.  We must learn to be happy with the baby steps that occur when we want change yesterday.  Just for a moment think back to a time that you that would never change or get better, yet it did get better and so did you. I have to believe things will get better.  We need to remember why we are here and how powerful we are.  We need to remember that having faith in our world and each other is very healing and can lead us to finding that the right road!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to page her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

They don’t sell happiness at the mall or online.  Happiness is free and available to all that want it.  Happiness is in those indescribable amazing moments.  Those moments that give you goose bumps and really let you know you are alive.  I call them as-good –as- it-gets moments.  I know the world feels hard but that doesn’t mean we can’t embrace the good and all the wonderful we have in our lives.  I think the secret to happiness is in feeling grateful every day for all that we are blessed with and not taking all the little miracles about life for granted.  The honor of being alive each day is truly a little miracle and an opportunity to be happy.

Take this moment out and take a moment to be grateful, to smile and to feel how you deserve to feel every moment of every day.  Now think about what you allow to steal your happiness and make a promise to yourself that you no longer will allow that anymore.  We all have hard pieces in our stories regarding our lives.  It’s in our reaction that we have the power.  Even though we have disappointments, loss, trauma and bad experiences we still have the power to decide we really want to be happy.  In fact in deciding we are going to be happy no matter what we are incorporating a fabulous coping skill into our tool boxes.  Learning to love yourself helps with feeling you are deserving of happiness every day.  Let go of the guilt and forgive yourself for whatever you have done.  Self-pity is also the root to unhappiness.  The past needs to be something that we all just learn from. The present is truly a gift and an opportunity to be happy each and every day. Make today the day you forgive yourself and set yourself free by choosing happiness!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

I have always looked for the unique in this world.  Growing up I always heard how different I was and how differently I did things.  I take pride in being unique and not wanting to be ordinary.  For me, being unique has always given me a silent inner strength, never a weakness.

The media seems to frown upon being unique and tells us who we should be if we’re to be accepted.  The media tells us what we should look like, what we should wear, what music we should like, what shows we should watch and how we should act, if we are to be cool and well liked.  I believe we should look like ourselves, wear what is comfortable, listen to music and watch programs that make us feel alive and then we are truly cool and should be accepted by others.

It takes a very strong individual to believe in themselves when they not the average.  It’s hard to be different but it’s even harder to fight that difference all of your life.  Learn to embrace who you are and celebrate in being a one-of-a-kind.  Learn to understand that there is such inner peace in being who you are intended to be.  Take all the energy you put into trying to be different than who you are intended to be and use it to be the best one-of-a-kind you can possible be.

I see many unique people wasting their lives trying so hard to be average and to fit in.  I wish people could learn to embrace their uniqueness and understand that they are very special and being special is a gift.  So please don’t throw that gift away because then you throw the best part of yourself away and then you waste your life!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

 Another school is almost over and every student can’t wait until summer.  Finals still must be studied for and taken.  Help your student do their absolute very best up until the very last test is taken, paper is turned in and last day has come and gone.  Help remind your student that they still can help raise that grade.   I know they are burnt out and feeling restless but keep encouraging them to keep doing their best until the end.

As school draws to an end help them think about what they would like to do with their summer.  I know many students will be attending summer school to get caught up or to get ahead.  If you have a high school student this might be a good summer to start looking at colleges and maybe even visiting a few.  It’s never too early to help somebody plan their future.  Education has always been very big in our household.  My son is 35 years old and has his Doctorate degree and I think about how hard he has worked over the years.

I think teaching our child to want to do well in school comes a certain mindset that is instilled by effective parenting.  Helping our children understand that it’s not okay to get lazy or to quit but that we must work hard right up until the end can be taught.  Learning and getting a really good education can take us very far in this world and makes us feel good about who we are in this world. So remind your student that they still have finals, papers and projects to complete.  Let them know how good they will feel if they can hang in there and work hard right up until the end.  Talk about some of the fun things you have planned for them this summer to help encourage them to hang in there and do their best!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to page her at (909).  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

We all have stories about our imperfect lives and childhoods.  Many of us have survived tragedy and horrific events.  There are many times where life seems to test us and just feels very hard and overwhelming.  These are the times we have a hard time seeing all the good, we have in our lives.

I believe with each new day, we have another chance at happiness and finding the good in this life.  So take a minute or two when reading this article and think about all the things that are very good in your life.  Do you have people that you love and love you?  Do you have a family?  Do you have a job, a roof over your head, and food to eat?  Do you have a best friend that would do anything for you?  Are you here today reading this article, which would mean you are still alive?  If you answer yes to these questions then there is still hope for you.  You see just right now you have been able to see the good in your life.  Wow, look how lucky we are! And it’s just about focusing on the good in our lives.

Alright so maybe you have a very different life than you had planned.  Our lives very rarely work out as planned and many times end up even better.  Think about all that you have been able to do and become and all the people you have been able to influence in a good way.  I think if we focus on the good in our lives we can’t help but grow into who we are intended to be.  When we become who we are intended to be, our lives just don’t get any better and each day is heavenly!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to page her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

I can remember gathering leaves of all colors and shapes, collecting sea shells and anything else that one might find in the water.  I would fill up my wagon with water and create an underwater adventure for everybody to enjoy with the use of a snorkel and mask.  My friends and I would put on singing and dancing shows for all the neighborhood to enjoy.  My brothers and I would create backyard carnivals for everybody to experience.  I was always playing dress up and had the ability to become so many different people.  This dress up play helped prepare me for all of the hats I have worn over the span of my lifetime.

I can remember my imagination was encouraged by my parents, family, and friends.  I credit that imagination for who I am today.  I credit my imagination for making me a creative thinker and a person that always thinks way beyond the box.  I know when I was raising my son, he always used his imagination in his play.  He would create the most wonderful lands in our living room.  His creations could make you feel as if you were transported to another world.  We would spend days playing in the worlds he created.  As an adult, my son Bryan is one of the most creative people I have ever met.  His imagination was encouraged and totally supported in every way.

Universities now are looking for the well-rounded individual.  I think helping your child develop their imagination is an important part of becoming well-rounded and learning to think for oneself and out of the box.  Imagination is such a crucial part of play but also a very important part of many careers.  Don’t allow technology to take the place of imagination.  Instead, find a way to incorporate both imagination and technology into your life and your child’s life.  Don’t be afraid to imagine.  Many times our imagination creates a path for our lives.

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909))

229-0727. You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s new books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops 

I am very blessed in that, as a therapist, I help people heal and then allow them to become the best version of themselves.  This is truly why I was put in this world.  As awesome as my life’s work is, please don’t underestimate the power that you all have in this world.  Every morning when Midnight – my dog – and I are doing our miles of walking we always run into people in our neighborhood.  It always amazes me how when they see Midnight they smile and when I say hello and wish them a beautiful day they light up.  It’s in the moment of connection with another being that we all have the chance to spread the good in our world.

You may not be a therapist, but each and every day you all have the power to spread the good in the world.  Saying hello and wishing somebody a beautiful day can make somebody’s entire day.  It’s such a simple act of kindness and goodness and you don’t need lots of letters after your name to do this.  I chat with the crossing guards as they help Midnight and I make our way safely across the street.  I chat with my neighbors and everybody I can.  I wish them some good and they smile.  It’s about giving the gift of joy and spreading the good and ultimately changing somebody’s day.  If you and I offer this gift, then hopefully they will pay it forward.

Yes I am an optimist, and I do have faith that we can change this world for the better.  It starts with you and me and even Midnight.  Together we can spread the good and help everybody understand that they have the power to make our world a better place.

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

Do you let everybody else run your life?  Do you feel as though you have no choices and that life can’t ever get better?  What is it that seems to keep you stuck?  How many times have you asked yourself these questions?  Let’s see if we can’t answer a few of them.  I think we let others run our lives because we feel that we don’t know how to, and, out of fear, we allow others to run things for us.  In terms of feeling, we seem to have no choices. As a therapist, I think this way of thinking is a bad habit that limits our expectations so that we do not have full faith in ourselves.

I believe we stay stuck because we get comfortable, even if we are miserable.  It also takes a lot of energy to change, and many times we don’t want to put forth that kind of energy.  The alternative is to do nothing and to just stay stuck.  Sometimes, we ask ourselves the same questions over and over, and at the time, we tell ourselves this time we will finally change.  I believe people mean it at the time they say this, but then they become complacent when it comes to actually doing the work involved necessary to get where they want to go.

Stop assigning blame to everybody else and everything else other than yourself as to why you don’t have the life you want.  We all have things that get in our way of our journeys, but it’s also up to us to overcome that adversity that stops us dead in our tracks.  I get so tired of people telling me they can’t when I know they can if they tried harder and fought for the life they want.  People are always putting off having the life they want by telling themselves once they get though this or that, life will improve and be what they want it to be.  The truth is that all they are really putting off is…. life!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

All we seem to be hearing about is “being mindful” and the benefits that come from it.  Be mindful involves being in the moment, being totally engaged in what you are doing.  For example, let’s say you are mindfully walking your dog.  As you walk, you really pay attention to the rhythm of your feet as you take each step.  You’re not thinking about anything; you’re just fully present and engaged in the action of the walking.  This idea of being fully engaged is the idea of being mindful.  You’re not thinking about what you will be doing after the walk or anything else; you are just fully absorbed in the walking.  This mindfulness should be incorporated into everything that you do all day long.  When you are mindful all day long, you are really putting yourself in a calm meditative state of being.

As I research pain management and meditation, I’m finding that mindfulness lowers pain because when we are fully present we are focused on what we are doing in each moment.  When we do this, we almost forget about the pain because we aren’t giving it our attention anymore, so our brain turns the volume down on the pain.  The stress of pain and all the worry about pain actually turns up the volume of the pain in our brains.  When we are mindful and less anxious, focused on the doing of the present moment, our focus is shifted; therefore, our brain turns down the volume of our pain.  So by being mindful, l we actually are able to manage the volume or intensity of our pain.

Practice being mindful with each chore or activity you do.  You will be amazed how your body starts to relax.  You will be amazed how you have less pain and are able to focus better.  I think of mindfulness as a kind of meditation for the everyday person.

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

When we are young, we can’t wait to turn eighteen.  When we are eighteen, we can’t wait until we are twenty-one.  Now that we are adults, we can’t wait to graduate college and get married.  Now that we are married we can’t wait to have a family and buy a house.  We now have it all, the family, the big job, and the big house, now we can’t wait until we retire.  Why is that we have such a hard time just living in the present?  It’s as if we are literally wishing our lives away.

People seem to believe the future holds the happiness that the present just doesn’t.  I always hear people say things will be different when I get passed that.  So time moves along and they do indeed get past that, and from nowhere something else comes along.  Now they are thinking things will be so much better when I get passed this. And so it is that this just keeps reoccurring.  Do you see a pattern here?  It’s called life and it seems as if it is always giving us something that we must get through.

Life is not a neat little package, it involves a lot of hard work and challenges.  Even then, there are times that we don’t get what we thought we really deserve.  Maybe these are the times to look at what we did end up with and realize it is even better.  We spend so very much time looking at what we don’t have and feeling sorry for ourselves.  Life has a way of giving us what we need, if just pay attention.  Things seem to work out if we are patient and willing to accept life’s challenges and live each day to the fullest!!!!!!!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients. She is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

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By Nancy Stoops

Just for a moment, think about your mindset regarding yourself.  What is your internal dialogue?  Do you tend to tell yourself you can, and so you do, or do you tell yourself you can’t so you don’t?  Also what is that mindset based on, and is it really your truth?  If you believe you can’t, think about all that you have already done successfully and learn to challenge that lies that hold you hostage.  I bet you are much more capable then your mind tells you.  Take out a piece of paper and fold it in half. Write down all of the lies that hold you hostage.  Now, on the other side, right down your truths based what you have already done successfully.  Next, make as many copies of this paper as you can, and take it with you everywhere. If you are able to, place them all over your house.  Next time you believe you can’t, the truth that you yourself have written down will remind you that you are already have been successful.  Pretty soon, you will be storing the truth in your mind.

Learn to challenge the incorrect belief system that has always held you back from being who you are intended to be.  The truth literally does set us free.  I was raised to believe I could fly.  This mindset has honored me with a life of blessings and success.  Learn to believe in yourself and in your capabilities. The truth is if you believe you can do something and work hard to accomplish it, anything is possible.  Believe you can and you will.  Our mindset literally is a road map for our lives.  Our mindset acts as a designer for our entire lives.  I hope you will take the time to change your mindset and take the opportunity to grow into the best version of you.

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com

By Nancy Stoops

Deciding to start therapy can be a very hard decision.  It’s hard to admit to ourselves that we can’t do it on our own and that we need some help.  The truth is even though we take care of ourselves sometimes we need the help of a good doctor or an antibiotic and sometimes surgery.  I have always referred to myself as an emotional surgeon.  What I mean by this, is that I open you up and help you begin to deal with all of those dysfunctional feelings that are making you feel so bad and so stuck.  Starting therapy takes an incredible amount of courage and is a sign of strength not weakness.  Please never feel embarrassed that you feel have run out of options and that now you need some help to get through some things.

Over the years I have worked with people 2-91 years of age dealing parenting, drugs, anxiety, depression, autistic spectrum disorders, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, appropriate sexual boundaries and so many other issues. Between my groups and my private practice I have literally helped thousands of people learn how to live a happy and balanced life.  I want my clients to be healthy mentally as well as physically and spiritually healthy.  I think all three of these go hand in hand to maintain permanent well-being.

A good place to start is by visiting one of my groups and seeing if you like my style before you start spending your hard earned money.  Keep in mind my co-therapist is a registered therapy dog named Midnight. If you are a dog lover you will have a great team on your side while you are doing some very necessary healing or just getting some tips on how to live more fully!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-072.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may ask Purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops 

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Everybody seems to be talking about wellness. I just did a seminar for the city of Walnut on wellness and we had over a hundred people attend.  I think wellness comes from having a healthy mind, body and spirit.  I tell my clients the same thing.  I think wellness comes from being quiet inside from knowing one is growing into who they are intended to be more and more each day.  I think wellness involves daily meditation and working to manage one’s stress, a healthy diet, vitamins and supplements and daily exercise and a faith in something bigger and more powerful than us.

Wellness is not something that just happens it’s a lifestyle that needs to occur daily.  It’s a desire to be operating at one’s optimum.  Your life will have much more quality if you are operating at your optimum.  If you bring total wellness into your life you will feel great and have the energy and mindset to live the wonderful life that each and every one of us is so deserving of.  I feel if I’m going to be here living my life why not do what I need to do to make it the best life possible.  I do all I can to bring optimum wellness into my life and my being every day.

Think about a starting point to bring wellness into your daily life.  Make your goals small and obtainable to start.  Once you’ve met these goals then add more.  Bringing total wellness into your life is a process and don’t beat yourself up as you go but praise yourself for the positive changes you are making.  I think if you add one change per week you are doing pretty well.  Something as simple as a daily walk and meditation can be a great place to start.  I wish you nothing total wellness in life!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

We all have dreams for our life.  Why is it that some of us turn our dreams into reality and some of us just keep dreaming?  Why do some of us find the motivation to make our dreams come true and others just give up?  I believe we are all capable of getting what we want from our lives.  I also think we all have the potential to grow into somebody that we are proud of being.  I think what sets a person apart is they believe they can or they believe they can’t.

I find it very sad when I see somebody with a vision of what their life could be, yet they think they can’t ever obtain the life they are suppose to have.  This person somehow has never been taught to believe in themselves and now gets cheated out of the life they should have had.  This is where really effective parenting is so very essential.  We also need to help those not so effectively parented reach for the sky as well.  We need to not give up on our dreams, ourselves and each other.

Dreams can become our wonderful reality if we create a plan with the correct steps.  Think about every other goal that you have met and the plan that was made up of baby steps.  I promise you that if you have a dream and want it to become your reality all you have to do is trust yourself and take the steps that turn dreams into reality.  The first step is having the faith and trust inside yourself to believe that you can do it.  Never lose sight of the already wonderful you and think of your plan as just adding to that wonderful person!!!!!!!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

By Nancy Stoops

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Most people believe that there is a road to happiness.  Most people believe that certain things need to occur to be happy.  Most people spend their whole life on a quest for happiness but never get there.  I believe happiness is a choice.  I believe happiness is a mindset.  I believe it’s about looking at all that is right with your life and being grateful.  If you spend your days always thinking about what your life isn’t or what you don’t have you won’t be very happy.  Now I’m not implying that people shouldn’t dream big and make those dreams come true.  I’m just saying be happy along the way to making those dreams come true.

Happiness occurs every day I have the honor of being alive.  Yes I had a brother that was murdered, a brother that committed suicide and a father that died from Pancreatic Cancer but I am still here for a reason.  I appreciate each and every day I am here and can make a difference.  I appreciate having a healthy body and the ability to work out every day with my amazing dog Midnight.  I appreciate the sunrise and all the beauty that nature has to offer.  I am happiest doing the simple things even though I have travelled the world. Saturdays with my grandson are about horseback riding and swimming and just laughing.  Saturdays make me very happy.  Watching my dog do his happy roll on the grass makes me filled with joy as I see him filled with joy.

I tell myself every day I refuse to let anybody steal my joy.  People might do and say things that could potential steel my happiness but I decide how I want to respond to their words and behaviors.  We are in control of us and how we respond to others.  I wish happiness and joy for all of you every day!!!!!!  

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancystoops@verizon.net. 

By Nancy Stoops

It’s that time of year where we all start setting some new resolutions for 2016.  As we do this, we also wonder why we didn’t meet our 2015 resolutions.  Usually the reason we don’t accomplish resolutions or goals in general is because we make them unrealistic.  We also don’t give ourselves credit for accomplishing part of the goal.  For example let’s say you wanted to loose thirty pounds this year and you lost fifteen pounds.  I say that you were successful because you did part of what you set out to do.  I say if we move in the right direction of our goals them we are successful.  I also believe that if we are able to incorporate this mindset then we will eventually meet the entire goal.  On the other hand if you feel you have failed chances are you‘ll probably put the fifteen pounds back on that you originally lost and then really beat yourself up.

Be smarter this year and set more realistic goals.  Also remember that all good things take time.  More importantly meeting a goal is usually about changing a habit.  It can take awhile some times to successfully change a habit.  Think of your goals as more of lifestyle changes.  If your goal is to lose weight or to get in better shape think about how long you have had your bad habits and that you are trying to make permanent changes in your lifestyle.  Don’t be so hard on yourself this year and learn to be happy with the baby steps that you accomplish toward the big goal that you have in mind.  Also learn to reward yourself as you accomplish each baby step.  Make this New Year the year you stop self sabotaging and finally meet those life changing goals.  I believe in all you and know that you can be and have what you deserve if you just follow my plan. Happy New Year!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.