Tag Archives: Nancy Stoops

Attitude Is Everything

By Nancy Stoops

Do you see a half filled glass as half empty or as half full?  Do you tend to see what’s wrong with your life or do you focus on what is right with your life?  Would you consider yourself a negative person or a positive person?  Do you wake up everyday being happy do be alive and hopeful about a new day or do you dread getting up?

The way that you have answered the above questions is probably also the way that you live your life and the way you view your life.  I believe having a positive attitude is foundational in being a successful human being.  Being positive, is essential to everything good that comes with this life.  I think it all starts by being positive about who you are and about behaving in a manner that makes you proud of whom you are.  Generally, if you like who you are and are a good person, people will like you as well.  Also, if you like who you are, you will want only the best for yourself.  This will cause you to go to college; get a good job, find a good mate and believe that you can make your dreams comes true.

On the other hand, being negative only prevents you from following your dreams.  Being negative also causes a lot of self doubt and really gets in the way of accomplishments.  Learn to look at the good in your life and at what you have done right so far.  Learn from your mistakes but don’t focus on them, otherwise your life will feel like one big mistake.  Look at all that you already have going right for you and learn to build on the positive and if you do, more positive will come to you!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)2290727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

The Winner of Your Personal Revolution

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Do you ever feel like you just need to make a huge change?  Are you afraid and so you stay stuck because this is what you have always done?  Maybe it’s time to have a personal revolution and really shake things up.  I think it starts by making a list of what you need to keep about you and what you really need to finally let go of.  It’s time to revolt and personally attack those demons and the lies that hold you back from being a great and powerful you.

I know it sounds crazy to stage a revolution against yourself or against the pieces you are sick and tired of.  I don’t know any other way to move forward if you are really stuck.  Fight hard and fight smart and do your interpersonal work.  What better day than today to claim the rights to you.  Stop letting others hold you hostage to being a lesser version of you.  Today is the day you take control of yourself and of your mind.  Has somebody make you doubt yourself, today is the day to fix that.  Today is the day you decide that you are proud of yourself and that you’ll will fight to become the best you can be.   I know you can win that internal battle and you can revolt against all the lies.

You owe yourself this revolution and I know you can win.  The past is over, the future is uncertain but the present is a gift that can help us unwrap our true inner being.  This is an inner being we can be proud and we can feel confident like never before.  This newly found confidence can help us see anything is possible and now there are no limits for us!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy atnancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

Your Child’s Best and Most Productive Summer

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Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

y Nancy Stoops

I am a very big believer in rest and relaxation and feel summer is a great time to do that.  I take a lot of time off in the summer to do exactly that but I must feel my summer is also productive as well.  I force myself to move at a much slower pace and I do play a lot more but I try to remember the concept of balance as well.  Summer also allows for some unique activities.

Please allow me to explain what I mean here.  I see summer as a time to work on special talents and projects.  Having a project can be very grounding and give you something to be working toward, which I believe is a very important concept.  This doesn’t in anyway, take away from very well deserved break.

The other really great piece about all of this is your child won’t loose all of their skills over the summer and returning to school will be easier.  Common sense tells us, if we don’t use something for three months our skills can become rusty.  By allowing our children to do absolutely nothing over the summer we are not doing them a favor, we are doing them a grave injustice.  Encourage your children to read a book, write a story about something fun, walk the dog to keep their muscles strong, help you add and subtract how many miles you’ll be traveling this vacation, understand why when you throw the ball up, it always comes back down, and just keep learning the whole summer through. Teaching them the way to find that balance that will enhance their relaxation, make them feel good about their productivity and allow them to have more fun than they ever have!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Midnight the Therapy Dog and Live Heal and Grow at Amazon.com.

 

Understanding Our Purpose in This World

By Nancy Stoops

When I was five years old my friends would line up on my front porch and give me a nickel to help them with their problems.  They would tell me that I had good advice even back then.  Even as a little girl I felt so good when I could make somebody feel better and ease the pain in their heart.  At five I knew my purpose in this world.  I knew I was put in this world to help people heal from their pain.  I knew even back then this was a gift from God and I was not to waste this present.

In high school my psychology teacher told me that I needed to go onto the field of psychology because she say something special in me.  Just like my little friends lined up for help she also saw why I was here.  Eventually I got the degrees and the license that honors me with being able to help many people in this world.

Understanding and honoring my purpose in this world gives me an immense sense of inner peace.  It makes me feel as if I’m following God’s blueprint for my life and that feels so awesome.  It makes me feel right with the world and with my life. It’s incredible to be able to make a fantastic living from the very work that I was always intended to do.

Please understand that all of you have a very special purpose here as well. Take the time to search your soul to find your unique reason for being in this world.  Then take the time to go and get the education that gives you the very credentials to do your life’s work.  I promise if you follow through with this you will feel a sense of nirvana.  Your life will be the very life that you have always dreamt about and you will be so very proud of who you are!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

The Secret of Life

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops      

Do you wonder what it takes to live your life well?  Do you question what life is all about?  Do you always seem to be fighting something in your life?  I believe the secret to life is to make the best of what your life brings you.

I think the idea of making lemonade out of life’s lemons is a very good one.  I think when we are given lemons our inner strength and our perseverance are tested.   I think the way we embrace our lives is by understanding that we will have good and bad in our lives.  I have found in my lifetime, if I can just get through the rough periods the sun is shining so brightly on the other side.  I just have to hang tight, get support and not lose my faith that one day soon, all will be well again.  I also have to trust myself that I will be able to fight my way through the dark clouds and find the light again. I have learned that I must be very gentle with myself during the stormy periods of my life.

Keep in mind that most lives have good and bad but some people just can’t endure the bad.  I find these people giving up and just giving into the bad and they seem to stop believing that the sun will shine brightly again very soon.  If we are to survive as human beings, we must embrace the secret of life and learn to make the best out of every situation.  I think part of the secret is trying to find the positive in the hardest and darkest parts of our lives. I hope you can find the secret of life and not let the dark times destroy your wonderful life!!!!!!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

 

 

Having Some Faith in Our Youth

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Soon they will be running our country and have children of their own.  Soon they will be telling their children all the things we told them.  I have had the honor of working with thousands of kids and teens of this generation and I’m here to tell you that they are amazing.  Now keep in mind there is good and bad in every generation but I think we have misjudged this generation.  Yes some of them have dabbled with drugs and alcohol and some are even afraid to grow up.  On the other hand many of them are working on making this world a better place.  The problem is we more often hear the stories about how they are shooting their classmates verses the youths that are doing things of heroic measures.

Just as we did they are crying out to be accepted and valued.  We shouldn’t put a label of lazy or frightened on this batch of youth because then they might become just that.  Instead we need to guide them and encourage them to grow into who God intends them to be.  This generation is very gifted in so many ways.  They care about making our world a better place but are frustrated because they don’t know where to begin because we do have many problems.  I see many future psychotherapists, environmentalists,

lobbyists, songwriters, singers, and attorneys.   I have had youth that are interested in pursuing careers in the mental health field come and observe my support groups.  I have had some even help me with my groups.  Mentoring can make a huge difference in a young person’s life.  Mentoring can offer hope and guidance.

Please don’t give up our or youth because that means giving up on our world.  Help guide and encourage them to grow into adults that they can be proud of them.  Teach them to not give up on themselves because each of them can make a difference!!!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancystoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

 

 

Calling For Responsible Pet Owners

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

It is on behalf of dogs everywhere that I write this article.  Being the proud owner of Midnight, the black lab/black shepherd mix shown with me in my photograph is truly a joy and honor.  Midnight is nine years old and very healthy.  Midnight and I take lots of long walks in our neighborhood and he has many buddies along the way.  Some of his buddies are very well cared for and live safe lives.  Some of his buddies aren’t so lucky and are let out to walk themselves.

I can’t believe how many wonderful dogs I have seen without tags and let out to walk themselves.  I can’t believe how many dogs end up hit by cars and die because they are illegally let out by themselves.  Legally dogs are supposed to be licensed, vaccinated and leashed when they are out off their property.  They should be walked by humans that can help guide them on what is safe and what is not when they are out of their house or yard.

A dog is a huge responsibility and an enormous joy.  Caring for a dog properly involves feeding them healthy food, cleaning them, vet visits, walks, licensing them, cleaning up after them, and always providing clean drinking water and shelter and lots of love, affection and attention.  It’s not okay to have a dog or any animal that is neglected.  There have been many new laws passed to help protect animals and people lose them everyday because of neglect.  So I ask you to think about all of this before you get an animal.  I beg you to stop allowing your dogs to walk themselves.  I ask you to understand how helpless they are and how much they count on us to care properly for them.  Please take the time to be a responsible and loving pet owner!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog.

 

Fight Depression with Being Grateful Everyday

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Gratitude isn’t something that should only be felt once a year on Thanksgiving.  I feel we should acknowledge everyday all that we are grateful for.  Being grateful seems to take us out of our pity parties and focus more on what we have rather then what we don’t.  We take so many things for granted and until we lose them we don’t fully appreciate them.  Every morning when Midnight and I do our daily hikes I think about how lucky we both are to have healthy bodies that still allow us to walk so many miles per week.  As we walk I think about how lucky we are to have each other and about all of the good times we have shared.  I also think about all of the people we have helped heal together.  I feel so blessed!

Having shelter, food, water, heat, air conditioning, a vehicle and all of the other basics are something we should feel grateful for daily.  I know life can be hard and throws many obstacles our way.  Yes I’ve lost almost all of my family but I’m still her.  I’m still here to help this world heal one person at a time.  I feel very blessed and honored to still be here and to be able to do the work that I do.  I learned a long time ago nobody comes to my pity parties so I stopped having them. Now I use gratitude when I feel sad or miss my loved ones and it gets me right back on track.  So don’t waste your life feel sad everyday instead look at all that you are blessed with.  Make each moment you have the honor of being alive count.  Make today the start of a brand new mindset.  Make yourself a promise to find the simple joys in your everyday life.  I promise if you do that you will combat your depression.  Oh and remember to always smile daily and learn to laugh often!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. 

 

Be Who You Want to Become

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Change is something that doesn’t happen overnight.  Just for a moment I want you to think about who you long to be.  For me I always want to be happy and peaceful.  The way that I work on this is by trying to smile, laugh and appreciate every day and then I am happy.  I also try to do the things that I enjoy and always have some type of adventure planned.  This is a good recipe for happiness for me.  As far as being peaceful, I meditate daily and try not to let things irritate me too badly.  I also must always remind myself that I am only in control of myself and of my responses.  I don’t have the power to control others.  This seems to be an equally good recipe for inner peace.  Now I must keep in mind I am human and that there will be very difficult days that maybe my recipes struggle but must pat myself on my back for tying my best.

Now it’s your turn to think about who you want to be.  Get out a piece of paper and write down one characteristic that you would like to obtain.  My example to help you will be living a healthy life style.  This doesn’t mean a crash diet and working out so hard for a couple of days that you can’t move.  It means that you will eat a well- balanced meal, exercise consistently, drink lots of water, get plenty of rest, quit smoking, learn to drink alcohol in moderation, and manage your stress daily.  This plan may differ for each individual because it will need to be balanced around the demands of each individual’s lives.  My point is we eventually become what we do and how we behave!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Are You Living to Die or Dying To Live?

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

 

Our lives are truly about our mindset and how we view our lives.  I must ask you if you are living to die or are you dying to live.  These two ways for which people live sure do look and sound the same but they couldn’t be more different.  Take a look at the first one, living to die.  To me that means the person is merely existing and just going through the motions until they die.  I don’t believe there is much joy or quality of life with this style of life.  I believe a pretty unhappy and dissatisfied person lives according to the idea of living to die. Now on the other hand a person who is dying to live has a life of joy and quality.  I believe they are satisfied with their lives and appreciate each and every day they are honored with life.

 

So how do you live?  Which of these two mottos do you follow? It’s never too late to change.  It all starts by changing your mindset.  It starts by letting go of your past, forgiving yourself and others and on being grateful each and every day we are honored to be here.  As you begin the healing process your mindset will start to help you see all the good in everyday and you will start to feel empowered by the self- induced changes in you and the way you think.

 

I hope the change will start by reading this article.  I hope you believe you deserve a better life and use this as a road map to take you there.  I have faith in you that you can make the change and get the life you are worthy of!

 

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancystoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

 

Anxiety and Our Youth

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops 

I have been a psychotherapist for eighteen years and have worked with people of all ages with various issues.  I’m constantly amazed when I have a child or teen brought to me for anxiety issues. We seem to have created a generation that feels very inadequate and struggles with growing up and being successful.  The issues this generation worries about are things my generation didn’t have to deal with. 

 

Our colleges are impacted and hard to get into.  Now kindergarteners have homework and are expected to read and know many more things.  Video games and television are replacing playing outdoors in the fresh air and getting much needed exercise.  This outdoor playing is such a great way to reduce or eliminate stress.  Social media unfortunately has made this generation very lazy and childhood obesity and diabetes are on the rise. 

 

As parents and community leaders we have a social responsibility to help this generation find a healthy balance in their lives in every area.  We need to support and encourage our youth.  We need to provide the necessary tools to help them strive to become their best.  We need to have faith in our youth as some many of them are diamonds in the rough.  We need to give them guidance and tools to help them shine and reach their full potential. 

 

We need to teach the teens that problems can we worked through and that drinking and drugs are not a solution.  We need to teach them how to meditate not medicate to quiet their busy minds.  We need to teach them how to relax by finding balance, getting organized, prioritizing and effectively managing their time and communicating what’s working and not working in their lives.  Please don’t assume they are all pot smoking video game playing lazy worthless human beings.  They are just scared and need some help finding their way! 

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net.   

Spring Cleaning For the Soul

By Nancy Stoops

I’m so happy to invite you to Spring Cleaning for the Soul, the latest wellness event facilitated by me and sponsored by the City of Walnut.  The event will take place on Saturday, April 14, 2018 from 8 a.m. until noon. This amazing opportunity to totally get cleansed mind, body and spirit will be held at the Walnut Senior Center located at 21215 La Puente Rd. in the City of Walnut.  You can register for this free event by calling the Senior Center at (909) 598-6200 or the recreation department at (909) 598-5605. There will be free childcare for youth ages 4 to 11 and registration is required to reserve your spot.  This event is very dear to my heart because it offers a sage burning ceremony to help you all get rid of any negativity. There will also be cleansing meditations, free massages, a free tea bar and snacks, and an opportunity to free yourself of anything that holds you back from being the best version of you!  I will also be signing both of my books that are available on Amazon and you will have an opportunity to meet Midnight the therapy dog. Massage Envy will also be joining me for this fabulous event.

I’m so proud to be able to help people heal and offer an opportunity to help others live a better life.  Please don’t put the importance of your wellness off any longer.  I know we all take care of others but make April 14, 2018 the day you start caring for you! I promise you will feel brand new and empowered to live the life you are so deserving of living if you take the time to attend this life changing opportunity. With each individual that helps him or herself by we start to heal the world one by one person at a time. Please don’t miss this opportunity to be part of this remarkable change!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s book’s Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

Finding The Good Is Possible

By Nancy Stoops

Being the eternal optimist that I am I still believe there is so much good in our world.  I see it everyday in random acts of kindness and I think people really want to be good and kind.  I think people are afraid because of what they hear on the news.  Many people are killing and hurting each other.  I think this makes it hard to trust each other.

On the other hand, there are lots of good things going on in our world but I just think the media tends to focus on the bad.  I can remember back some time ago where they actually devoted ten minutes of the news to the good that was happening that day.

I still believe that good always out weighs the bad in our world.  I also believe it is truly up to us to seek out the good and create even more of it.  We are only here once and for me, I want it to be about all the good this world has to offer.  I also know I need to do my part and be a good influence on this world.  I need to treat others in a kind and loving manner if I am to expect that back from them.  In other words, I need to practice what I preach.

I need to do my part if I have these expectations for our world.  It needs to start within our families, our friendships and other relationships, our communities, and so on.  We need to model goodness and kindness, especially for our children.  We need to remember how simple it is to be a nice person and how much negative energy goes into being mean and hurtful.  We must learn life truly is wonderful and good!!!!!!!!!

 

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancystoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

Are You Living to Die or Dying To Live?

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Our lives are truly about our mindset and how we view our lives.  I must ask you if you are living to die or are you dying to live.  These two ways for which people live sure do look and sound the same but they couldn’t be more different.  Take a look at the first one, living to die.  To me that means the person is merely existing and just going through the motions until they die.  I don’t believe there is much joy or quality of life with this style of life.  I believe a pretty unhappy and dissatisfied person lives according to the idea of living to die. Now on the other hand a person who is dying to live has a life of joy and quality.  I believe they are satisfied with their lives and appreciate each and every day they are honored with life.

So how do you live?  Which of these two mottos do you follow? It’s never too late to change.  It all starts by changing your mindset.  It starts by letting go of your past, forgiving yourself and others and on being grateful each and every day we are honored to be here.  As you begin the healing process your mindset will start to help you see all the good in everyday and you will start to feel empowered by the self- induced changes in you and the way you think.

I hope the change will start by reading this article.  I hope you believe you deserve a better life and use this as a road map to take you there.  I have faith in you that you can make the change and get the life you are worthy of!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancystoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

 

The Amazing Power of Positive Thinking

By Nancy Stoops

I’m always told that I’m a very positive thinker despite all the tragedy my life has brought me.  Yes I’ve experienced many horrific things in my life.  I don’t focus on all that I have lost and on all of the death that I have experienced in my life.  I stay focused on what I have left.  I also spend a lot of time thinking about how very blessed I was to have had those amazing beings in my life even though they have left this world.  It really comes down to how we think about it.  If we stay in a positive mindset and every day we feel gratitude we will experience our lives in a very wonderful manner.  With having a positive mindset we are stronger and more able to overcome the many obstacles that we are challenged with during our lives.   A positive mindset always makes us believe that “we can” rather than “we can’t” and this is huge difference in how we respond to our lives and all that comes with it.  If we stay in the mindset of “we can” then anything is possible and it’s as if we “will” ourselves to get through anything and have a great life no matter what comes our way.

I know life is hard but if you can change your mindset you will literally change your life.  There is a lot of power in changing your mindset from negative to positive.  I think it’s the closest thing to having superpowers us mere mortals can obtain.  You will be amazed how differently your life goes when you embrace the power of the positive mindset.  It’s almost as if now you “will” the universe to send you all the good that you have always been so very deserving of.  Make today the day you become your very own superhero and adopt the power of positive thinking!!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

Healing Your Heart and Spirit

By Nancy Stoops

It takes an incredible amount of courage to start therapy.   Many people start therapy but leave just as they are really starting to deal with their core issues.  In order to really heal, a person must not only face their demons but take them on and beat them.  This is a scary yet very necessary process if one is to be free from all that holds them hostage.  I can’t think of anything worse than a life wasted because the person was too scared to take on their demons.  On the other hand it is such an honor to help somebody walk through the journey that allows them to take on their demons and beat them.  It is a miracle to me and such a blessing that this is my life’s work.

Sometimes life can deal us tragedies that we think we will never recover from.  I think many things can stop us in our tracks for awhile but do believe we are capable of healing from anything.  I think to heal from the really hard and awful things we must have a strong desire to do so. At seventeen when my brother Rory committed suicide I thought that was the end of me.  In my early forties when my brother Jeff was murdered I was so angry I thought my anger would destroy me.  Later in my forties when I saw my father through his last days, I thought my sadness was going to swallow me up.  I honor their memory by being filled with zest and being who I am intended to be.  It’s been a hard but priceless journey finding my way through it all and it wouldn’t have happened without a lot of healing work. Make today the day you start healing and finally living the life you deserve!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909)229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

 

Giving Up Isn’t Allowed

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

I’ve always known since I was five years old or so I was put in this world to make it better and to help others heal.  People often wonder why I’m so very positive even though I have lost most of my family.  I feel I don’t have the luxury of giving up.  Every single day I wake up I feel honored to have yet another day of life and to me that is just one of the many things I’m very grateful for.  In fact it’s that gratitude that has kept me going all of these years.  Being grateful every single day you have the honor of being alive is necessary if you are to have a life of quality.  Recognizing all that is right with our lives can be the simplest cause of attitude adjustments.  It literally helps us to see the world and our lives as a gift. That’s why today is called the present when really it is a present.  This very lovely present should be honored and appreciated daily.

I know the world and what we hear about it can make us want to give up.  I look into my grandchildren’s eyes and all of the tens of thousands of people’s eyes that I have helped over the years, and I know I’m just not allowed to give up.  I know I was created to heal and help the beings in this world.  I know all of the horrific things I have lived through have made me the strong and compassionate woman I am today.  There have been many lessons learned while going through those horrible but teaching times.  Just for a moment think about all of the wonderful things you have in your life and all the lessons life has taught you.  Do me a favor and make a promise that together we will all find a way to make this world better and no matter what you won’t give up!!!!

 

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker. She also runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

The Recent School Shooting

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

The horrific shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School on February 14,2018 is something that will be so very difficult for so many to recover from.  I remember being in court seeing my brother’s picture after he was murdered by a bullet to the head.  I know it took a very long time to get that horrible image out of my head.  As I listened to the story I thought about the massive number of people that were affected by one very angry and unstable young man.  I thought about how all of the parents felt especially if they lost a child.  I thought about how many of the students will suffer from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.  I thought about how hard it will be for those students to go back to that school, a place that was always seen as safe until that day.  I also thought about the shooter and what his life is prison will look like.

They say the shooter had been expelled for behavioral issues.  Many people saw his posts on social media but I guess nobody really understood how angry or how sick he really was.  This breaks my heart for everybody concerned.  I think about how differently things might have turned out if this young man would have gotten the mental health services he needed.  As I read about him I hear he was bullied and that both of his parents that adopted him passed away.  I hear he had an unusual fascination with guns. If you look at the profile for most of the shooters involved in these horrific shootings most had been bullied.

I guess what I’m saying is don’t wait until it is too late if you see signs that somebody needs mental health services.  I also want to send my prayers and my love to everybody that was involved in this horrific incident.  My heart goes out to all of you and I hope with time you all will begin to heal!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

 

Everyday Heroes

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

There is so much good left in our world.  I run into wonderful people daily.  In my eyes you don’t have to acquire super powers or wear a cape to be a hero.  For me, a hero is somebody that models all the good characteristics one should have.  A hero is a person that lives up to their potential and strives to be better each and everyday.  A hero is a person that gives fully of themselves because it’s the right thing to do and doesn’t expect anything in return.  Look around and you will see plenty of everyday heroes.  You will find them teaching our children, protecting our community, mentoring others, saving lives and putting out fires, giving grants and scholarships and modeling who we’re intended to be in this world.

Giving unconditionally is one of the greatest gifts one can offer to this world.  It is the stuff that can make another understand, just how important their existence is to this world.  It can literally save the life of another.  Sometimes people just need a break and being an everyday hero can offer that break for another human being.  Don’t take your life for granted instead strive to be an everyday hero.  Being an everyday hero doesn’t require lots of letters after your name or a fancy college degree. You can make a huge influence by just being the wonderful person you already are and by sharing your kindness and compassion with another.

Our youth needs heroes and a sense of hope in a very chaotic time in our world.  It is our job to be everyday heroes and guide them.  Strive to be your best each and everyday.  If you do this I’m sure your inner most everyday hero will be unveiled for the world to see!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  She has a private practice in Diamond Bar and is currently accepting new clients; she is also a motivational speaker who can inspire your employees or group members.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups on how to manage anger.    For more information about any of these services feel free to contact her at (909) 229-0727. You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoos@verizon.net.  You may purchase Nancy’s books, Live, Heal and Grow and Midnight the therapy Dog at Amazon.com.

You Can Depend On You

Licensed Marriage Family Therapist

Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

By Nancy Stoops

Just recently I had an experience that reminded me of how very capable I am and how I can depend on myself.  After my fabulous trip to Antarctica, I found out the airline to fly me home was on strike.  It seemed like I was so alone in this and must admit very frightened.  I needed to get home my mom and dog had been hospitalized when I was gone.  I went to the airport with the other fourteen- hundred people and stood in line for eight hours and finally got somebody to listen to me after sobbing at their counter.  It took two days to make this happen.  Even though I had a great travel agent there wasn’t much she could do from her end.  She told me to go to the airport and stand in line until I could somebody to take pity on me.  They were telling many people it would be eight or nine days till they would have a flight home.  That was unacceptable for me as I really needed to get home.

When I finally boarded the plane that would take me home I cried with such a sense of relief.  I have travelled all over the world and only had two uncomfortable things happen.  I was detained for bringing an apple into Mozambique from South Africa and when I arrived in South Africa after a grueling flight I was yelled at by a customs agent to stand up straight and show some respect.  This airstrike was different it was truly frightening and I felt like I was never going to get home.  The thing that got me home was how I remembered all that I had already gotten myself though.  I thought about all the deaths in my family and all the trauma I had handled and work though in my life.  I remembered how many times I had depended on me to get me though the trauma.  In remembering who I was I was able to find my way home!!!!

This article was written by Nancy Stoops M.A., M.F.T.  Nancy is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist.  Nancy is now accepting new clients.  She also works as a motivational speaker.  Nancy runs free family support groups, a group on loss for seniors, and groups for teens and can handle many court mandated needs.  For more information about any of these services contact Nancy at (909) 229-0727.  You may e-mail Nancy at nancyjstoops@verizon.net. You may purchase Nancy’s books Live Heal and Grow and Midnight the Therapy Dog at Amazon.com.